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JUL
24
Berlin Fire Department winds down before summer recess
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
JUL
24
Berlin (dpo) - The hard-earned holidays have arrived: The Berlin Fire Department is heading into the summer recess. From tomorrow onwards, all fire extinguishing and rescue work will be put on hold for six weeks, until the firefighters return to service on the 1st of September. Read more »
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DEC
28
Smoker dies of heart attack on seeing unsettling graphic health warning
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
DEC
28
Gelsenkirchen, Germany (dpo) - Having discovered a brutal graphic health warning on his packet of cigarettes, a 53 year-old man from Gelsenkirchen, Germany, died of a heart attack this morning. Critics of the tobacco industry regard the man’s death as proof that the graphic health warnings are working – after all, he finally stopped smoking after 39 years. Read more »
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DEC
16
8 signs that your postman is trying to kill you
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
DEC
16
Postmen are important as they bring you bills, reminders and advertisements. But what if he is secretly out to get you? What if he is just waiting for the right moment? The Postillon presents eight sure signs that your postie is trying to kill you. Read more »
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DEC
06
Pedestrian collides with parked smart car, car totalled
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
DEC
06
Mainz (dpo) - On Tuesday, a careless pedestrian in the city of Mainz collided with a parked smart car, totalling the car. According to witnesses, the man who caused the accident was moving at a speed of approx. 2 mph. Afterwards, the man, whose identity remains a mystery, fled on foot. He is now wanted by the police. Read more »
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NOV
20
Death-trap swings: majority of German playgrounds not fitted with winter tyres
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
NOV
20
Darmstadt (dpo) - German playgrounds are insufficiently prepared for the cold season – that is according to the results of a nationwide investigation carried out by the Technical Inspection Association TÜV which sampled over 300 sites. In particular, their experts criticised the lack of winter tyres on swings and seesaws. In adverse weather conditions, this could cause life-threatening accidents. Read more »
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NOV
18
Man unsure how much to spend on Christmas present after agreeing not to exchange gifts
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
NOV
18
Vancouver (dpo) - It is quite the conundrum. William McLaughlin from Vancouver is once again facing his annual dilemma: how much money should he spend on his girlfriend Susanne? The problem is that the couple have agreed not to exchange gifts for Christmas. This has ended disastrously for the 29-year-old for the last two years. Read more »
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SEP
20
New ‘burkdl’ enables devout Muslim women to attend Oktoberfest
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
SEP
20
Munich, Bavaria (dpo) - Finally, devout Muslim women need no longer forego beer, pork knuckles and hearty oompah music. Today, a fashion designer from Munich unveiled his latest creation, which he calls the ‘burkdl’. The garment is a cross between a burka and a dirndl, merging eastern and western traditions elegantly and respectfully. Of course, it had to be approved by an Imam before it could hit the shops. Read more »
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JUL
22
News Ticker (19)
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
JUL
22
+++ "Please, take assheat!": Man guides guest to butt-warming chair +++ +++ Shoplifting: Godzilla takes away entire supermarket +++ +++ Blue toe: dwarf planet bruises foot +++ +++ Ran somewhere: internet security specialist disappeared after hacker attack +++ +++ Some more war: Russians celebrate tea time in Ukraine +++ +++ Just in: Bieber's new Album has arrived +++ Read more »
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JUL
18
Heroic passer-by smashes car window to save multipack of beer from dying of heat stroke
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
JUL
18
Peterborough, UK (dpo) - Saved in the nick of time! A man from Peterborough showed real courage today: he saw a multipack of beer which looked certain to die a painful death from heat stroke in a car that was parked in the direct heat of the sun. He acted swiftly to save it, smashing in the front window of the car. Now, Daniel Ruston is even due to receive an award from the City of Peterborough recognising his bravery. Read more »
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JUL
08
“Right, that’s enough!”: Queen to reinstate absolute monarchy
By:
noreply@blogger.com (Der Postillon)
on
JUL
08
London (dpo) - In the wake of the political chaos following Boris Johnson's resignation as Prime Minister HM Queen Elizabeth II has announced that she has had quite enough. Today in a televised speech the 96 year old monarch declared that the system of parliamentary monarchy was to transition to one of absolute monarchy with immediate effect. Read more »
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